LIFE LESSONS LIFE CHANGES

My God Dream

2009-03-04T16:09:00.001-05:00

I got sober about 4 yrs ago.I turned my life over to Jesus and began my journey of searching for Gods will in my life.I was in a recovery house that was looking doubtful it was gonna stay open,the house was full when I first started in november 04 by janurary 05 it was empty except myself the house director and the pastor they were great help.I hit recovery hard going to meetings often. I started to form a network of friends including people from the next step.my relationship with God got closer and it continues to this day.my God dream didn't happen till spring of 2007 thoughts of a recovery house started to enter my thoughts at random and it was re-occuring and still happens today.I ask God a lot how and can I do this and he assures me daily it' ll come to be.in fall of 2008 God said its time to go to work so I've been connecting with influential people in recovery and in the church for there input,advice,and counsel.God works on his schedule not mine. I wait faithly on him.I would love show anyone struggling with alcohol or drug addiction how the power of Jesus Christ transformed my life into the person I'am today.

WHEN YOU THOUGHT I WASNT LOOKING

2007-05-30T05:43:00.002-04:00

WHEN YOU THOUGHT I WASN'T LOOKING anonymous(written by a former child)A message every adult should read, because children are watching you and doing as you do, not as you say. ___________________________________________________When you thought I wasn't looking,I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint another one. When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind to animals. When you thought I wasn't looking,I saw you make my favorite cake for me and I learned that the little things can be the special things in life. Whe n you thought I wasn't looking,I heard you say a prayer, and I knew there is a GOD I could always talk to and I learned to trust in GOD. When you thought I wasn't looking,I saw you make a meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I learned that we all have to help take care of each other. When you thought I wasn't looking,I saw you give of your time and money to help people who had nothing and I learned that those who have something should give to those who don't. When you thought I wasn't looking,I saw you take care of our house and everyone in it and I learned we have to take care of what we are given. When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw how you handled your responsibilities, even when you didn't feel good and I learned that I would have to be responsible when I grow up. When you thought I wasn't looking,I saw tears come from your eyes and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it's all right to cry. When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw that you cared and I wanted to be everything that I could be. When you thought I wasn't looking,I learned most of life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and productive person when I grow up. When you thought I wasn't looking,I looked at you and wanted to say, "Thanks for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn't looking." ___________________________________________________We all influence the lives of children around us every day.......

Things I Learned In Life

2007-04-10T05:57:00.000-04:00

THINGS I LEARNED IN LIFE
I've learned -That you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.I've learned -That no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back. I've learned - That it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.I've learned - That it's not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.I've learned - That you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better know something.I've learned - That you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do but to the best you can do.I've learned - That it's not what happens to people that's important. It's what they do about it.I've learned - That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.I've learned - That no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides. I've learned - That it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.I've learned - That it's a lot easier to react than it is to think.I've learned - That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.I've learned - That you can keep going long after you think you can't.I've learned - That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.I've learned - That either you control your attitude or it controls you.I've learned - That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.I've learned - That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. I've learned - That learning to forgive takes practice. I've learned - That there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it.I've learned - That money is a lousy way of keeping score.I've learned - That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.I've learned - That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.I've learned - That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.I've learned - That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.I've learned - That just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.I've learned - That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.I've learned - That you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.I've learned - That your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't just biological, but of the soul.I've learned - That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.I've learned - That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.I've learned - That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.I've learned - That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.I've learned - That sometimes when my friends fight, I'm forced to choose sides even when I don't want to.I've learned - That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.I've learned - That sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions.I've learned - That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.I've learned - That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.I've learned - That two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.I've learned - That no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.I've learned - That there are many ways of falling and staying in love.I've learned - That no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves get farther in life.I've learned - That no matter how many friends you have, if you are their pillar you will feel lonely and lost at the times you need them most.I've learned - That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.I've learned - That even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.I've learned - That writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pains.I've learned - That the paradigm we live in is not all that is offered to us.I've learned - That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.I've learned - That the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon.I've learned - That although the word "love" can have many different meanings; it loses value when over used.I've learned - That it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe

730 DAYS

2007-03-26T11:31:00.000-04:00

What can I say but wow! I struggled with addiction since I was 13 yrs old on november 21,2004 I surrendered I gave my will an life over to God of my understanding.I opened the door, I heard the knocks but refused to listen to them I knew it was Jesus I wanted to do things my way not Gods way I had to be shown beat down and broken I accepted Jesus back in my life, my life has never been the same.

I have entered a world I have forgotten years ago I feel like a child again everything to me is like a new experience.In some ways I feel as if I was dead during those 25 yrs of addiction.

God is beside me at all times showing me how to live. it is so amazing.He has given me friends something I never had before,He took to a city (sidney ohio) where I knew no one,now I have a network of friends who love me for who I'am.I feel worthy now,and know who I really am.

Im on this journey that I dont want to stop every day is new full of Gods loving grace a power so great that almost makes me want to cry.I know that God has great plans for me in the years to come I pray to him often and talk to him as my friend.

My hope is to help people to know who God is and his amazing power and how he can change a person and their lifes for the best life to come.I'am so full of gratefulness I wanted to share it with everyone.

Its great to be sober today,I must progress foward no matter what,

MY STORY

2007-03-21T16:53:00.000-04:00

My name is Glen and I?m a alcoholic and Jesus CHRIST is
my higher power.I was born in Lima Ohio and lived in a small town Delphos,
13 miles west of Lima, most of my life. I was raised up
Catholic and my family was middle to low income, we had
what we needed. I remember growing up always feeling
different. When I was 8 years old I had a serious bicycle
accident. A car hit me doing 65 mile per hour, I flew 120
feet landing on my head. I had a serious skull fracture and
broken bones. I recovered over time but had to wear a
football helmet for 4 years to protect my head. In 1978 the
helmet wasnt like we have today, it was bulky and stood out.
I was riddiculed and made fun of alot. My self esteem was
real low. I started to build a protective wall around me, brick
by brick. During this time I always felt a connection with the
nuns, priest,and spiritual people. I never understood why. I
had very few friends, but family life was good.As I continued to grow up I kept building up my walls. By
my 6th grade I pretty much isolated myself. My brick wall
was solid and thick.No one could get in and hurt me. I
remember searching alot for God because I was lonely. I
believe he called for me, I had a desire that came from my
heart that I believe I was to serve God, but around this time
is when I started drinking and experimenting with drugs. I
found a new way of life or least I thought. What I found was
an altered Glen. I started out hanging out with people and
making freinds who liked to drink and do drugs. At 16 I got
my first girlfriend and was drinking, smoking pot pretty
regular on a weekend basis. I received my 1st D.U.I.. My
school life stayed the same but I was getting into trouble a
lot more, my grades declined, and I started to get
suspended.In my senior year I remember getting called a drunk or an
alcholic. I really didnt care cause I still had that brick wall I
built around myself and I still used it . In my teen years my
family life was also getting worse. I argued more with my
parents, me and my dad never got along. My life didnt seem
to be going too good. Right around graduation time I met
another girlfreind. We both liked to drink and we started a
relationship. I graduated and the situation with my dad got
worse. That summer I received my 2nd D.U.I. I crashed and
totaled my car by running into a ditch doing 90mph. I
suffered a concussion. In the fall, me and my girlfriend
moved in together. We got married. I finally thought life was
getting better. A year later we had a son together. I was
finally happy or least I thought, but the drinking and
partying kept progressing. I received my 3rd D.U.I. in that
time. A year after our son was born my wife told me she
didnt love me anymore and that really leveled me.I entered my first treatment center as an attempt to get my
wife back, which didn't work. My faith in God got less and
less. My drinking and drug use progressed even more.My
trouble with law enforcement increased. My drinking started
to cost me jobs, my mental state started to deteriorate, I
started to get depressed. I started to isolate and go on
drinking binges for days or until I ran out of money. I would
end up in the hospital. I got diagnosed as having severe
depression and began taking anti-depressants. They didnt
seem to work but I was still drinking on top of them. I
started to play around with the mental health professionals
and soon found pills that calmed me down like alcohol,
(xanax,volume,adivan). I soon found mixing the pills with
alcohol really gave me the effect I liked.I started to blackout. The drinking progressed even more, I
ended up in treatment center after treatment center. My only
contact with God was" get me out of this one and I'll
change". When I would get out of treatment centers I could
only stay clean for awhile then I would be on that
rollercoaster again. Things in my life were getting worse. my
drinking , my isolating, and my son moved out to his moms.
I started to loose things: my job,my house, my vehicle, my
possesions. I was burning every bridge that I had, even the
support of my family.Things never got better, just worse. I would drink till I had
no more money. Then I would end up in the treatment
center. In my alcocholic life I?ve been in 19 treatment
centers. Ive had seven D.U.I.,s ,and have been in several car
crashes. On my last drunk all my ties with anyone were
broke including my family. I had no where to go so I took the
money I had from my last job, called a taxi and went to Lima
and rented a hotel room. I commenced to try to drink myself
to death. Drank for 2 solid days in the hotel room by myself.
I didnt know if I was coming or going and the last day I felt
the most loneliest feeling I've ever felt. I felt completely and
utterly alone, apart from the world and God. I was in hell. I
was scared and didnt know what to do. So I called my mom,
shes always been my angel always looking out for me.She
convinced me to call an ambulance, so I did. In November 2004, as I was going into the treatment
center, I began to cry. I didnt want to be there again. I
wanted to die, but the nurses reasured me that I was in the
right place .I was broken. I n my room that night I prayed to
God and surrendered my life to him and asked for help. He
did and it was clear. I was reminded of the serenity house in
Sidney ohio.The next day I talked to guy named Rick at
Serenity House. I was still detoxing and I dont remember
much. After 3 days of detox I went to the Serenity house
unsure of anything, but I knew I didnt want to drink. Rick
welcomed me with compassion and care. He became my 1st
best freind in sobriety along with the house directors Larry
Grieshop and pastor Ben Hunt. They were the only friends I
had in sobriety. I didnt know anyone else in Sidney. This
time I followed the rules in Serenity House, began hitting
meetings twice a day, got a sponsor right away,and I started
to get honest about myself. I got to know the people in the
recovery meetings and started to attend a catholic church to
reconnect with God, because I new I needed him in my life. I
attended regularly.and began praying on a daily basis as
suggested by my sponsor. About 2 or 3 months into my
sobriety I met Scotty in the rooms and we started to hang
out together, going to a lot of meetings, and became like
brothers in recovery. We worked recovery together,
eventually we moved in together. I was always trying to get
Scotty to go to church, he wasnt really willing to go but I
persisted. By a series of situations we BOTH ended up going
here to Ginghamsburg church. We had heard Bill Wise talk
about it in the rooms, we had gone to Tom Barnes funeral,
he was Scottys old sponsor and we found out he had been
involved with Ginghamsburg also. A friend gave Scotty a
copy of Mike Sandalins book and we saw how HE was
involved with Ginghamsburg. Something was drawing me to
Ginghamsburg, the holy spirit. Ive been here almost a year
and since my first visit my heart has been on fire. I've never
wanted to get to know Jesus better in my whole life as I do
today. I started to serve on the Next Step and felt so fufilled with
God. I wanted to be more involved with church so I attended
the Followers Life course to become a member of this loving
family. I was baptized last Sunday. It feels so good to belong
today.Today I continue to work the steps with my sponsor. I've
worked through the all the steps, right now I'm working on
step 3. I go to 4 to 5 meetings a week, attend this service
weekly, use the daily transformational Journal. Iget up an
hour before I go anywhere and spend it with God praying
first then I do meditation. At night I read and pray and thank
God for my day, review my day. I went on the Emmaus walk
this year and I'm reading The Purpose Driven Life. I have
been sober 24 months.My best friend Tommy and Rick from serenity house who I
was really close to, died. Addictions took there lives all in
my first year in recovery, strong reminders to me this
disease is no joke,its not something to play around with.I keep in contact with my son, I think he's proud of me.
Our relationship isn't as close as I would like. As for my
family its good. They're grateful they have a sober happy
son.God put me on a wonderous journey, something I thought
impossible at one time.